In Part I of this blog post, I shared my stories of fundraising flops as Joan, the Fundraiser. In this blog post, I will share my cautionary tales as Joan, the Donor.
THREE TIPS FOR MAKING AN ASK
1– ASK FOR THE RIGHT AMOUNT
Eileen and I had not yet hit 30. We had just bought our first house and joined the local temple. I cannot begin to tell you what info they had about us and the assumptions they made.
It is possible that we went to a new member event and spoke about our careers in entertainment, heard about the capital campaign, and said something offhanded like “Let us know how we can help.”
Note: there is nothing offhanded to a fundraiser about that sentence. It is pure code for ASK ME.
They came to our house and asked us for a contribution that warranted a head explosion emoji. And we said the thing that most kind people say when you make too high an ask, “We look forward to the day when we can contribute at that level but that is not at this time. But, we can do X.”
In time, with a sense of gratitude and a feeling of deep appreciation, we made good on that promise.
It is worth noting that many years before our donation, the seed had been planted with us that our gift would benefit us as well as our temple.
WAIT! THAT IS ALL YOU ARE ASKING US FOR?
Renewal time. A visit from the leader of the organization. It’s a local organization and we know folks at different levels. We are surprised at how few individuals are at the higher levels of giving.
During the year before we had been quite actively engaged and stewarded and we were ready to upgrade. But, we were asked only to renew.
So I know a lot about fundraising but it was my wife who kindly said, “I don’t think you asked us for enough money this year. Your organization’s work has been outstanding and you have done such a wonderful job keeping us engaged and informed.”
The leader looked sheepish. Of course, I offered a fundraising seminar right then and encouraged the leader to leverage our upgrade with several other folks up for renewal.
2 – KNOW YOUR POTENTIAL DONOR
A new major gift officer at my alma mater saw my giving history and came to visit me at my office at GLAAD. This person asked for a donation on our first visit and moved very quickly to ask me to contribute to my alma mater at the same level we were giving to GLAAD.
He didn’t ask me much about my undergraduate experience. He should have asked an LGBT activist how my experience with my alma mater was as someone who was LGBT.
I had stories. Some while I was in school but mostly after the fact as I watched what my alma mater wasn’t doing to support and embrace LGBT students.
I asked him to outline the programs and what efforts were being made to support LGBT students. He had nothing. I told him that when he had something to offer, I’d be happy to meet with him again.
In addition, my gift to GLAAD stood out as particularly significant because I donated a portion of my compensation so we would have less money to raise.
3 – TELL THEM HOW MUCH YOU LIKE THEIR OUTFIT (A BONUS TIP FROM MY THEN 9-YEAR-OLD)
Finances were more than a little shaky and our Development Director arranged for three donor meetings in San Francisco.
My charge was to ask each person for $25,000. I decided to bring my eldest daughter, then about 9 with me – she was on school holiday – and spend an extra day or two sightseeing. I arranged for some child care.
I can’t remember why but the first two prospects said an outright no. The third went just as well. I was going to leave San Francisco with zero dollars raised. I returned to the hotel to my daughter who wanted all the details. I went through each sad tale. She thought for a moment and then said “Maybe next time you should tell the person how nice they look or how much you like what they are wearing.”
I’m pretty sure that would have made no difference but I found it hilarious. So too did every single attendee at a GLAAD house party for about a year when, before I made the ask to the group, I retold that story and then told them how they all looked just great.
I hope my stories and the advice embedded in them give you more confidence and more tools to make an ask that feels right and that is specific.
And might I add that while I can’t actually see you, I bet you look great.
KEY TAKEAWAYS: PUTTING IT ALL TOGETHER
Let me leave you with some practical advice that I believe is embedded within all the stories taken in their aggregate. In case you missed it, be sure to check out fundraising flops in part I.
- DO YOUR HOMEWORK. Find out as much as you can about the donor and how much you should ask for.
- DON’T PLAY SMALL. Be bold but humble.
- DON’T BE A JERK. Never assume what a donor is willing to contribute. Be informed, clear, respectful, and honest.
- ASK FOR A SPECIFIC (RIGHT) AMOUNT. There was a time when we saw a $5,000 gift come in online. Unsolicited. Within a week we had connected with this person and before the year was over, the $5,000 unsolicited gift had increased to $25,000. This prospect made an online gift to an organization she learned about and found really effective, so she donated $5,000. Without being asked. That is a $10,000 gift if you make it in person. And more if you continue to ignite their enthusiasm for your work.
- BE INTERESTED IN MORE THAN THE MONEY. Your ability to ask for the right amount is a direct correlation with the number of other questions you ask during your lunch – about the person, their family, the causes they hold dear, and their philosophy about philanthropy.
