joan garry

Look.  I know I am no longer welcome in this club.   And while I think this photo is hilarious, it does not evoke fond memories of my devotion to Catholicism.    As I believe I have mentioned before, it only really stands as evidence that I did wear a dress once and that I did get a watch as a gift that year.  And it is also about as close as I will ever get to a wedding dress (but if I have something to do with – and i do!) but not a marriage license.

I was watching NBC Evening News last night.  Albeit in about 45 second bursts.  It was Halloween you see and 6:30pm is absolutely peak traffic time here in my New Jersey neighborhood.

But when this segment came on, I kept the ghouls waiting.  A piece about the marriage equality battle in Maine.  I learned that the Catholic Church is leading the opposition.  No real surprise there.

But what I learned is that Maine’s Catholic Churches are passing TWO BASKETS each Sunday during this battle. One to cover the bingo cards (OK, and the priest’s salaries – sorry, I’m getting bitter) and ONE TO FUND THE FIGHT AGAINST MARRIAGE EQUALITY.

I guess I should not be surprised but I am absolutely beside myself.  I posted this on my Facebook page last night and people commented that they thought it might be illegal.

I don’t know about that but I do know that it is not at all catholic (small ‘c’ intended).

In case you didn’t know, “catholic” with a small “c” has a very specific and clear definition.  Just ask Webster.

With a small ‘c’ it is an adjective meaning “broad or wide-ranging in tastes, or the like; having sympathies with all; broad-minded; liberal.”  The second definition listed:  “universal in extent; involving all; of interest to all.”

My mom typically spends Christmas with us here in Montclair, N.J. and I accompany her to Christmas morning mass.  It is my one annual appearance inside a Catholic Church (unless a niece or nephew marries or one of the offspring of said nieces and nephews are baptized).  It’s fine.  I even sing along with the carols – I just simply can’t resist the opportunity to harmonize.   I never go to receive communion.  That would just seem hypocritical.  And it actually feels wrong.

But when the basket is passed, I have my $20 at the ready and I toss it right in the basket after my mother has done her tossing.

It never struck me before that this was hypocritical.  Or even that I was funding the Catholic Church.  Or that I was donating to a cause that actively worked to deny my constitutional rights.  A cause that fuels anti-gay bias which leads in a million different directions.

I just thought it was nice.  I thought I was being catholic (small ‘c’ intended).

I hope I remember to do this but I am going to print out the article about what the church is doing in Maine and put it in an envelope and toss it in the basket as it passes on Christmas morning.

Maybe  I’ll include this picture too.  And a picture of my family.  With my mother.  Who goes to church nearly every day.

Now that strikes me as a donation with real value.